A 44-YEAR-OLD man still has the same top five celebrity shag list as when he was a young man, it has emerged
Self-employed carpet fitter Nathan Muir made his list 23 years ago, in the halcyon days of 1999, and has remained steadfast to the same fantasy one-f**k paramours ever since.
He said: “I think it shows that I’m a better man than Leonardo DiCaprio, for example, who’s always ditching his latest bird for a younger one. When I commit it’s for life.
“Take Britney Spears. She’s been through a lot since I made that list but I never once considered dropping her, because she’s got an absolutely fantastic arse.
“Kelly Brook’s put on weight exactly where you’d want her to, Jennifer Lopez was hot as f**k in that stripper film, Charlize Theron’s not aged a day, and while you don’t see Andrea Corr that much she still looks cracking.
“But even if they’d let themselves go a bit, so what? It wouldn’t change the way I feel. I’ve put on five stone and lost my hair since then myself. It’s what’s in the heart that matters.
“Yeah, I might have gone through two divorces and a string of infidelities since then, but I’ve remained true to my top five shags.”
