A CONSERVATIVE MP is accused of striking at the very fundamentals of rural life with a bill to ban marriage between cousins. 

Richard Holden, member for Basildon and Billericay, has slapped traditional Tory voters in the face by introducing a fancy metropolitan private member’s bill banning the age-old practice without which many country communities would not survive.

Norman Steele of Lowestoft said: “Tractors on Whitehall again, is it? Because once again the townies are meddling with what they don’t understand?

“First fox-hunting, then the removal of agricultural relief from inheritance tax we’ve had since time immemorial ie 1984, and now you’re meddling in our love lives and family. Specifically our right to combine the two.

“We can’t help it if you’ve got ugly cousins. Out here, when the moon is high, the baling’s done and it’s a 40-minute walk to the neighbouring farm, we love who we want to love.

“You’d have thought the Tories would have understood. How this Holden lad’s got the nerve to talk about ‘congenital anomalies’ with his face I’ll never know.”

Holden said: “Oh God, I’m so sorry. I thought I’d found a new way to be racist and instead I’ve hurt those ignorant rural voters we treasure the most.”