Politics

'This is discrimination against twats', says Toby Young

TOBY Young has condemned a campaign against him as being a form of prejudice against twats.

No f**king way, says UK after Jeremy Hunt promoted

BRITONS are convinced there has been a terrible mistake after health minister Jeremy Hunt was promoted in the cabinet reshuffle.  

May exercises power with sweeping changes to cabinet's lunchtime seating plan

THERESA May has flexed her political muscle by imposing a radical new lunchtime seating plan on her Cabinet.

I wouldn't change one thing about the past year, says Theresa May

THERESA May told colleagues she has had a wonderful 2017 and there is not one single thing she would do differently.

The Mash guide to Christmas with your favourite politicians

HAVE you ever wished you could spend Christmas with Diane Abbott, Iain Duncan Smith or better yet both?

May's last remaining ally is an imaginary rat called Bixby

THERESA May’s last remaining ally in cabinet is an imaginary rat called Bixby that wears a hat, she has confirmed.  

Labour confirms Brexit strategy as pandering to shouty Northern bastards

LABOUR’S Brexit strategy mainly consists of not upsetting angry Northern men like the ones on Question Time, senior MPs have revealed.

'I'm still in control', says most ironic prime minister ever

THERESA May is head-and-shoulders ahead of rivals in the competition to be Britain’s most ironic prime minister ever, historians believe.  

EU comforts May by reminding her it doesn’t give a shit

BRUSSELS officials have comforted Theresa May by reminding her they care no more about her stupid Commons defeat than they did about her idiot election.

Trump visit could actually be the thing that stops us all hating each other, agrees Britain

BRITONS have agreed that a visit from American's evil president next year could actually be the thing that reunites their divided nation.