Politics

WHAT ho! If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s that sometimes you can’t avoid kissing the a*se of an unstable orange buffoon. Here’s how to do it.

JEREMY Corbyn yesterday announced Labour’s new cock-up of a Brexit policy that nobody will vote for. But how will it fall apart in practice?

BREXIT deal? I would have got the best deal in 20 minutes, maximum. Here’s how it should have been done:

WE’VE heard plenty about slavery involving Africans who suffered this and went through that. But what about the worst form of slavery in history, Britain’s subjugation by the EU? 

ARE you one of those people who’s decided to ignore every Brexit problem and just demand ‘no-deal’? Read our guide to what sort of bloodyminded idiot you are.

THE UK is slowly coming to terms with the fact that Boris Johnson will be our next prime minister – but how far along are you in the process?

DUE to a hospitality mix-up, you’ve invited either prime-minister-in-waiting Boris Johnson or prime-minister-in-exile Jeremy Corbyn to a dinner party. But which would be the worst company?

BORIS Johnson wants to bring in an immigration points system for the UK. But how will it work?

CONSERVATIVE leadership candidate Boris Johnson has revealed himself to be the mysterious Busmaker of myth and legend.

BORIS Johnson has vowed to slash taxes for Britain’s hard-pressed unicorn breeders.