Politics

NICE liberal voters still find it hard to grasp that the government enacts nasty policies because its supporters like them. Conservative voter Norman Steele lists his favourites.

ARE you a hand-wringing liberal who thinks we should heal the divisions in society caused by Brexit? Here’s how to befriend a working class Leave person.

WANT to look good? Tell everyone what they want to hear and make promises you have no intention of keeping. The prime minister explains how to lie your way to the top.

THE UK has woken up massively hungover with a vague dread that it did something really f**king idiotic last night.

THE United Kingdom has started to munch on the sh*t sandwich it made for itself nearly four years ago.

THE prime minister, who will give a Brexit speech at 11pm tonight, has confirmed he will only make speeches when Britain is sh*tfaced. 

ARE you a Brexiter with mad ideas about life after Brexit, or a ridiculously melodramatic Remainer? Here are some things that won’t be happening.

A BREXIT rally has been attended by almost 150 people who do not appear to have a f**king clue about what they are celebrating. 

DAILY Express readers have blamed political correctness gone mad for not being allowed to burn Remainers alive in a wicker man on Brexit Eve. 

HUMAN sexual responses are complex and affected by a wide range of stimuli. But does your penis only become tumescent by waving a tiny Union Jack or are you normal?