Science & Technology

PLACING a key in your front door increases the risk of pissing yourself by up to 97 per cent, experts have found.

HAVE you unwisely trawled Facebook for old schoolmates and exes and been horrified by what you saw? Here are the people best left in the past.

ARE you kindly helping your ageing parents get ‘one of these Smart Phones’? Here’s how to keep your blood pressure at safe levels.

DO you feel compelled to share your gormless thoughts online? Here’s how to sound like the thousands of morons found in the average comments section.

A FAMILY of four have confirmed they cherish every moment they spend with their high-speed wireless router.

AFTER a nail-biting landing, NASA’s Perseverance rover is now assessing the rocky Martian terrain with a sense of deep disappointment.

EXISTING emojis are fine for plebs, but don’t convey the complex feelings of Guardian readers. As Apple launches more than 200 new ones, here are some just for them.

CONSUMERS agree that people who write product reviews on Amazon are pitiful losers, despite reading every single one and finding them very helpful.

A WOMAN who had a quick one-second peek of Instagram has looked up to find five years of her life have disappeared.

WANT to snoop on your former schoolmates in a pathetic attempt to feel good about yourself? Here’s how to pry without getting caught.