Lifestyle

Last remaining mouse mat expected to fetch up to 80p at Sotheby's

THE WORLD’S last remaining mouse mat will be put up for auction this week, with experts predicting a sale price of up to 80 pence.

Woman spends entire holiday photographing her legs in front of some water

A WOMAN has spent an entire holiday taking pictures of 'views' that just happen to be behind her tanned legs.

'Fun run' pretty f**king light on fun

A LOCAL fun run has been slammed for being mainly just running.

Pack of cards only thing holding family holiday together

A PACK of cards is the only thing holding a family holiday together, it has been confirmed.

The middle class guide to ruining a picnic

A PICNIC is the perfect meal: finger food with booze and hardly any washing up. But thankfully middle class people have found ways to complicate it. Here's how to ruin your next one.

Woman one item of clothing away from being fully dressed as a leopard

A WOMAN on a night out is one item of leopard print away from being confused with a jungle cat using its hind legs to walk.  

Cornwall was great, says liar

A MAN who claimed his family holiday in Cornwall was great is obviously lying, it has been confirmed.

Cockblocking friend just the extra hurdle man chatting up woman needed

A MAN who was ‘cockblocked’ whilst chatting up a woman in a nightclub has revealed it was just what he did not need at that moment.

Cost of living pretentiously in London up 50 percent

THE daily cost of living like an affected tw*t in the capital has rocketed in the last year, it has emerged.

Astrology fan perplexed she can't get boyfriend

A WOMAN who is a strong believer in astrology cannot understand why her strange supernatural belief system has not led to a lasting relationship.