Lifestyle

A DOG has been left humiliated after his owner forced him to wear a novelty jumper on a walk around the park.

THIS year has been shit enough without attempting to sort out all the huge, festering problems in your life. So treat keep sweeping all of these things under the carpet until 2020 is over.

A MAN has been to his barber for his fourth haircut of 2020 like the high-maintenance bastard he is, it has emerged.

DO you think you’re impressing people by quoting wise sayings? Check they’re not the following overused phrases and you actually sound like a twat.

NOBODY has more than six friends, and if you do most of them are filler. Here’s how to sift the worthwhile friends from the dregs dragging you down.

A COUPLE have opted to spend tens of thousands of pounds on home improvements instead of just buying a new f**king house. 

THE parents of a two-month-old baby were told to ‘treasure every moment’ as their daughter was covering them in vile bodily fluids.

WILL people not stop knocking on your front door? Either scrawl ‘COVID PLAGUE HERE’ on it or give short shrift to the following bastards.

WERE your lockdown experiences deeper and more meaningful than everyone else’s? Do you need to tell them?

A WOMAN on the receiving end of a barbed, underhand comment has remained tragically unaware that she is being judged.