A MAN never just gets up and instead hits snooze on his clock radio until the last possible moment before he has to go to work.
Despite setting the alarm for 7.30am, Tom Logan spends an hour in a fitful sleep interrupted every nine minutes until he absolutely has to get up in a massive panic.
Logan said: “Yes, I do leave getting up until the last minute, but I can be dressed and out of the door in seven minutes if I don’t have a shower and brush my teeth while having a shit.
“I always mean to get up but my bed is too nice. It’s just so snuggly and full of interesting dreams, whereas work is full of nasty angry people. It’s no contest really.”
Girlfriend Nikki Hollis said: “It’s fucking pitiful to watch. By 8.15 I’m having a relaxed coffee and feeling together, but Tom’s having these weird nine-minute sleep sessions to avoid facing reality.
“The stupidest thing is he could just set the alarm later and have an extra hour’s proper sleep, instead of this exhausting, half-awake, half-dreaming state.
“This morning he muttered ‘Watch out for the cybermen’s cheese house, Keira!’. I didn’t go into it.”