International

WITH Saint David’s Day in full swing, the Welsh have privately admitted their language is not catching on as much as they hoped.

PRESSURE has been building on a local takeaway after it distributed a promotional flyer which does not condemn Russia.

RUSSIA could easily invade the UK next. Here socially awkward fantasist Tom Logan explains how he’d form a resistance movement after watching Red Dawn too many times.

ARE you a ‘low-information voter’, ie. a bit thick? Here we answer the depressingly clueless questions you’ve undoubtedly got about the Ukraine crisis.

THE prime minister has revoked the permit of the ToryStream 2 cash pipeline which spews banknotes into Conservative party headquarters. 

WORLD War Three has arrived just when you were busy with your pathetic little Twitter argument and fitness plan, it has confirmed. 

WITH Russia launching a full-scale invasion of Ukraine, a selfish idiot has paused to think of the fuel prices.

HAVE you jumped to the conclusion that Russia invading Ukraine makes them the bad guys? Let me steer you left with Bill McKay’s Socialist Guide to Geopolitics.

WARY of Putin’s motives after his latest speech? An average Twitter user who is not a Russian bot explains why the great leader is flawless.

BRITAIN is markedly less enthusiastic about war with an opponent that started it and is hard as nails, it has emerged.