International

FRANCE, Germany and Italy have suspended use of the UK-developed AstraZeneca vaccine following reports that it turns you into a raging gammon.

FOLLOWING the discovery of a handful of local Covid-19 cases, New Zealand is currently halfway through a demanding three-day lockdown.

THE UK has applied to join the Pacific free trade area after international trade secretary Liz Truss managed to completely f**k up reading a map.

GOVERNMENT quarantine rules have made foreign holidays impossible this summer. But have you already booked one and if so, how thick are you?

PARCELS sent to or from the EU now carry extra charges, a detail left out of the Brexit deal. Leave voter Norman Steele explains these vindictive costs.

AMERICANS have made more television than anyone else, and we’ve got nothing else to do but watch it. But why do they say these words f**k all like they’re meant to?

HE’S without doubt the greatest president ever, beating even Richard Nixon and George W. Bush. But what do you remember about Trump’s four years at the helm? 

ARE your ludicrous QAnon conspiracy theories crumbling around you as Trump leaves office? Here’s how to pretend you expected this all along.

I HAVE been treated so unfairly by this country. So, so unfairly. It’s really a tragedy how badly they’ve treated your favourite president, and also these guys.

DONALD Trump has just 24 hours left in office. What final anti-democratic asshole acts can he squeeze in before he finally departs?