EUROPE has imposed a 100 per cent tariff on the never-ending deluge of shit American television the world has spent decades drowning in.
From midnight last night, imports of Selling Sunset, any of the Real Housewives franchise, documentaries about alien encounters and The Curse of Oak Island will cost exporters twice as much because it is basically waste disposal.
A White House insider said: “This is going to hit Trump hard. He owes his whole presidency to shite TV.
“He’s not yet understood the concept of retaliatory tariffs anyway – every time one’s announced, he leaps out of his chair saying ‘What? They can do that? But they’re not America’ – and this one’s personal.
“We have to be realistic and admit that once you’re charging double for NCIS: Los Angeles, a show most Europeans have only seen when jerking awake at 4am after killing two bottles of Riesling on a weeknight, then it’s unsustainably priced.
“This could be the end for FBI: Most Wanted, Chicago Fire, American Pickers, Young Sheldon, Pawn Stars, Below Deck, Is It Cake? and Dr Quinn, Medicine Woman. Poor Europeans. They may never see their incredible like again.”
Horst Schutz of Munich said: “We have many entertaining programmes in Germany. For example Gartenvermesser, where a man settles land disputes by minutely measuring gardens.”
