Food

CONFECTIONER Cadbury’s can no longer display a Royal Warrant after an incident between the King and a Creme Egg which he is still not entirely over.

The UK has once again been shaken to its foundations by the discovery that just because a mince pie is expensive does not mean it is the nicest tasting.

THEY used to be everywhere. It’s all your sister’s asked you to get in return for her laying on the whole Christmas day. But have you left it too late for a cheap tub of Heroes?

MORE than £25,000 worth of pies have, to the amazement of no-one, been stolen in a Yorkshire pie heist.

VEGANS are being sold ordinary nut assortments with numbers written on as specialist vegan advent calendars, it has emerged.

THE Daily Mail has rightly shamed Gen Z for favouring ‘woke’ sandwich fillings like avocado and foreign cheese. But at Pret a Gammon our sandwiches are all resolutely traditional. Try one of these.

THE UK’s obese are to launch a groundbreaking legal case against their own sofas, they have confirmed.

HALLOWEEN? Load of bollocks if you ask me. Another American import we neither want nor need, like Starbucks, Black Friday and taking the knee. Not sure if the last two are related.