Environment

STORM Goretti has swept the country with snow, except in quite a few areas where not a flake fell and residents are understandably suspicious. Snow or hoax?

LONDONERS have been amazed to discover that Cornwall continues to exist when they are not visiting their second homes during the summer.

YOUNG people believe that anxiety about the effects of climate change is a plausible reason for immoderate use of recreational drugs.

AS temperatures fall, Britain’s soft and pathetic Southerners are turning up their thermostats.

FANTASTIC. Just what I needed. A full day’s deliveries to do in the face of heavy rain and 95mph winds from a storm named after my ex-girlfriend.

A WOMAN is so in love with autumn she has attempted to take it home and f**k it, concerned friends have confirmed.