Celebrity

ANDREW Mountbatten-Windsor, who remains beloved by his public, has somehow been on the wrong end of a right twatting. But who could have done it? We investigate.

YES, I’ve been sticking my oar in again, but that’s fine because I’m an expert on Britain from surfing the internet while high. Here’s what I've learned.

DUA Lipa is off the market. But do not let that deter you, an overweight man in Reading, from your quest to land a hot, high-earning pop princess. All these are still available.

TOM Hardy has been dismissed from hit drama MobLand, which is on a channel you do not watch and have never heard of. But why? We make up the reasons.

KEIR Starmer is so right to face down his massive unpopularity, as proved by these examples of people who bounced back from being hated to become the nation’s darlings.

A SWINDON woman is unsurprised that Vernon Kay and Tess Daly have separated, because 16 years ago he sent numerous explicit texts to a Page 3 stunner.

THE 12-year-old heir to the throne is moving to big school, but which educational establishment should we pay the fees for him to attend?

THE animal kingdom have clubbed together to get Sir David Attenborough a birthday greeting performed by a stripper, they have revealed. 

THE Princess of Wales has announced she is embarking on a solo trip to Italy where she intends to take a lover.