Business

SAUSAGE factories have defended their reputation, saying they are worthwhile businesses without which there would be no sausages.

LITTLE Chef has removed Heston Blumenthal dishes from its menu after realising that people did not want to eat minced clocks.

GOOGLE'S incredible HQ has been revamped to include a shed where employees can masturbate.

THE US National Security Agency has assured Google it can make its tax problems just disappear into thin air.

UNATTRACTIVE estate agents are to blame for the fragility on the UK property market.

ABSOLUTELY everything your colleagues do is annoying, it has emerged.

APPLE'S diehard fans are queuing outside the company's stores eager to snap-up the latest beautifully designed way of avoiding tax.

THE high cost of petrol may not be caused by poltergeists, it has emerged.