THE public has called for the RBS bankers who made a £1 billion profit to be replaced by bungling hate figures.
The bank’s best results since 2008 have left people confused about who to blame their financial woes on.
Builder Stephen Malley said: “I’ve never got any money and for the last six years I’ve known exactly whose fault that was – the bankers who lost it all gambling on bonds or something.
“But now they’re doing better, so I’m forced to consider the idea that my six grand overdraft and failure to make mortgage payments could be my responsibility.
“Fire those bastards and put somebody who hasn’t got a fucking clue in charge.
“I’m available.”
A spokesman for the British Banking Association said: “This is a difficult situation for us.
“On the one hand, RBS needs to show a paper profit in order to increase bonuses to absurd levels which is, after all, the whole point of banking.
“On the other, on no account can anyone be allowed to think that a business in public ownership could be in any way successful. It’s a real dilemma.”
