Arts & Entertainment

THOM Yorke might be a creative genius but his singing sounds like a cat being squished between two breeze blocks. Here are some other tuneless bastards.

I DEFINED punk, and decades later I’m keeping that f**k you spirit alive by competing to be Ireland’s Eurovision entry. Because that is f**king punk, and here’s why.

EVERYONE has to pay the bills, even ex-celebrities. Here are some acts who are only still in it to make ends meet.

LET’S not f**k about. There are no nightclubs open. The bars are empty. Tired old pantomimes dominate theatres. It’s just you and me now.

PRINCE Harry’s life story will soon become a series of epic blockbusters and the basis of an expanded cinematic universe, it has been revealed.

WHAT better way to ruin your reputation as a musician than by launching a dreadful side project? Here are some of the worst.

TODAY’S teenagers have only experienced lame sequels to great films you loved as a kid. Here are some that make you look weird due to the new ones being total shit.

WOULD Father Christmas visit Gilead? It seems unlikely. Here are some other shows that would not suit a festive Christmas special either.

THE opening lines of Christmas carols are belted out, but after that voices quickly fade. Nobody remembers how the f**k these go.

THE cast of EastEnders have enjoyed a happy, restful and peaceful Christmas entirely free of murder, divorce, fistfights, or cancer diagnoses.