Arts & Entertainment

The moron's guide to being constantly surprised by Antiques Roadshow

ANTIQUES Roadshow viewers appear to be thrilled by the same things happening every week. To get the most out of the show, these entirely predictable events should shock you to the core.

Relight my Fire, and other hit songs about arson

ARSON is a niche crime but, along with stealing hearts or organ trafficking as it’s better known, one of the most musically popular. These lit up the charts.

Man not watching The Traitors unable to understand society

A MAN who is not watching The Traitors is completely unable to understand his friends, colleagues and the world around him, it has emerged.

Game shows sexual perverts want to see rebooted after the success of Gladiators

GLADIATORS is back, thanks to the eternal appeal of muscular hotties in sparkly lycra grappling with each other. What other reboots would appeal to deviants?

Will Mellor, and other bafflingly undeserving prime time TV careers

DESPITE apparently having minimal talent, some TV stars have mysteriously been appearing on our screens for decades. Like these.

Nerd should be happy everyone's into his superhero shit but isn't

AN uppity dork who likes comics is annoyed his hobby has become popular after big-budget adaptations made superheroes interesting.

Do You Really Want to Hurt Me: Songs you didn't realise were so f**king narcissistic until you thought about it

MUSIC may be the food of love, but it's also fuel for passive-aggressive controlling behaviour. Take these popular hits with sinister narcissistic undertones…

We've allowed old lady another chance, Gen Z generously confirm

YOUNG people have kindly given nice old lady Sophie Ellis-Bextor another chance at pop success.

If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next, and other songs that are major self-owns

RECORDING crap for money? Sometimes your subconscious gives you away by announcing it’s bollocks in the lyrics, like these.