Politics

Clegg's mum writes angry letter to Cameron's mum

NICK Clegg's mother has written to David Cameron's mother demanding an end to the cruel taunting of her son.

Tories to have Euro summit explained to them slowly

FEVERED Tories are to have the purpose of the crucial Euro summit explained to them as slowly as it takes.

Plan to pay off deficit with bits of old soap 'not working'

THE government's plan to wipe out Britain's deficit using little bits of discarded soap is not going well, David Cameron has revealed.

May 'thought illegal immigrants had tentacles'

THERESA May relaxed passport checks as she assumed that foreign criminals looked like enormous moustachioed sea creatures, it has emerged.

G20 leaders revealed as covert anti-capitalism activists

THE leaders of the G20 nations are undercover anarchists who have deliberately destroyed the West's capitalist economy, it has emerged.

Why would you think pension strikes are about pensions? asks TUC

TRADE Unions are to press ahead with pension strikes because the strikes are not about pensions and never have been, it was confirmed last night.

Thatcher agrees to meet Palin if she can hit her with a stick

BARONESS Thatcher has agreed to meet Sarah Palin if she can whack her with a big stick every time she says something stupid.

Cuts attacked by people who think they are a bad idea

THE debate over government cutbacks took a dramatic turn last night after they were attacked by some people who have never liked them.

MPs debate whether that Imogen is just a gold digger or what

THE House of Commons has staged a landmark debate on whether that Imogen Thomas knew what she was doing all along, so she did.

Clegg to veto punctuation in NHS reform bill

NICK Clegg restored his political authority today by threatening a revolt over the use of punctuation in the NHS reform bill.