Society

WITH all relatives and friends met and all obligations discharged, the entire UK is not open to seeing any f**ker this weekend.

PEOPLE love to complain about how bad they have it, especially pricks who've been handed everything on a platter. Here's what they enjoy whining about.

CHRISTIAN bakers are bravely holding out against making cakes for gay people. As the ECHR drops a case against two of them, godly baker Martin Bishop explains how to keep your cakes straight.

THE 'Colston Four' being cleared of criminal damage spells the end of our once great country. Here gammon Roy Hobbs explains why.

A COMPLETE and total dickhead actually has big hopes for the coming year.

CHRISTMAS is a time for doing things you’ve done so many times before that you hate them. Here are some traditions you’d love to see the back of.

AN ARTIFICIAL Christmas tree is jealous of real Christmas trees because they are allowed to die.

YULETIDEOLOGISTS have long agreed that 70s Christmases were the best. This judgement by men in their late 50s is objective fact. Here’s why.

YOUR parents’ house cannot accommodate you, your sister, your brother, his wife and their kids, so you’re sleeping on one of these.

LOOKING forward to the tedium of talking to arseholes who love Christmas trivia? Here are some well-known facts you’ll have patronisingly explained to you.