Society

ENGLAND believes itself to be a nice place apart from the presence of humans, it has emerged.

TWITTER'S 'Vine' app means everyone will now be famous for just six seconds.

A HIGH speed rail line to the north will bring a much needed economic boost to central London, say experts.

A SATANIC ritual in Devon has received top marks in every category on attendees’ feedback forms.

THE most middle class tattoo is the word 'moustache' in a speech bubble, coming out of a swallow's mouth, on the wearer's finger.

FLEEING the UK is an intelligent thing to do, it has emerged.

THE future of high streets is as nostalgic theme attractions depicting pre-Amazon Britain, it has been claimed.

AS snow continues to fall, Britons are being encouraged to take up arms against it.

PEOPLE who seemed ill-tempered, stressed or otherwise miserable may be legitimately pissed off, it has been claimed.