Society

A KNOW-IT-ALL who thought a ready meal would be so simple he wouldn't need instructions has had to fish the box out of the bin.

A MAN who will spend the entire summer mistaking the contemptuous stares of strangers for admiration has already got his diablo out, it has emerged.

A TODDLER threw a tantrum purely because he is a little bastard, it has emerged.

A MAN who wants to get back at everyone from school has surprised no-one by joining the police.

‘MILLENNIALS’ are the least fortunate generation in recent history apart from the ones who got conscripted, it has been claimed.

A 21-YEAR-OLD barman looks up to his 24-year-old counterpart like he's some sort of guru, it has been confirmed.

AN office worker has unveiled plans for a ground breaking skive while her boss is away this week.

A 32-YEAR-OLD woman thinks her cat might be ‘the one’, it has emerged.

A MAN is planning to carefully assess the risks and benefits of Britain leaving the EU then just vote on the basis of not liking immigrants, he has announced.

BUS lanes mean that Soviet Russia is still alive and well in Britain today, a motorist has claimed.