WOMEN love a man with interests – especially if they’re as sexually-charged as these. If you’re not already a devotee of one of these hobbies, try them and brace yourself for a sexual tsunami.
Steam engines
When you drag her to a crappy village in the middle of nowhere to look at a metal hulk that travels at 12mph, ask yourself – how turned on do you want your girlfriend to be? If the answer is ‘gagging for it’, be sure to drop in lots of facts about how this later model differs from the one you saw last week in similar, if not identical, circumstances.
Reading graphic novels
Women go weak at the knees at the thought of a man who reads – especially if his books of choice have pictures in them. They find superheroes particularly intellectually impressive. After you’ve shown her your collection of mint condition first editions, suggest she dress more like the impossibly busty heroines on the page. She’ll be undressing faster than you can say ‘She-Hulk’.
Fly fishing
Women love the idea of a macho survivalist type like Bear Grylls who can provide for them with his bare hands, or in your case hundreds of pounds of fishing tackle. Take her fishing one weekend – she’ll be soaking wet in more ways than one after a 7am start at the canal, reeling in exotic species like ‘perch’ and ‘trout’.
Clay pigeon shooting
There’s something inherently erotic about the act of firing a gun. Maybe it’s a bit like an ejaculating cock? Anyway, watch her lose control of her faculties as you don tweeds and protective earmuffs to shoot at falling bits of plate, tacitly assuring her that in the event of a pottery-based war, she’d be safe with you.
Brewing
Shakespeare once said something like ‘Beer is the food of love’. Prove him right by getting your lady friend involved in cleaning out your homebrew pressure barrel and measuring out yeast. Or give her a special night out at you and your mates’ beer-tasting evenings at the local flat roof pub. But be careful. Heavy stouts are a powerful aphrodisiac.
