Arts & Entertainment

Thanks Pixar, say little shits

EVIL children have thanked Pixar’s Inside Out for putting the blame on cartoon characters.

New Ant-Man film mainly about how dirty everything is

NEW superhero film Ant-Man  is about how absolutely filthy your house seems when you are only a few millimetres tall.

Trainspotting 2 to be junkie superhero film

THE sequel to Trainspotting will be a superhero film about a man who gets special powers from 'space heroin'.

Harper Lee's third book is racy technothriller

THE third manuscript by octogenarian Harper Lee is a fast-paced thriller about a heist on the Chinese stock exchange, it has emerged.

Holy Spirit to get spin-off testament

THE third member of the Holy Trinity is to star in its own all-new scripture, it has been revealed.

Knowing about San Diego Comic-Con now somehow acceptable

FOLLOWING the latest news from the San Diego Comic-Con is now a normal part of life, it has emerged.

Ghostly English teachers insisting adults read Go Set A Watchman

LONG-DEAD English teachers are appearing to their terrified former pupils to make them read the To Kill A Mockingbird sequel.

Han Solo origin film tells story of Star Wars

THE new Han Solo origin movie will tell the story of how he rescued Princess Leia from the Death Star before helping her brother destroy it.

NME to become a free sachet of hair gel

THE NME is to broaden its appeal by becoming a free sample of hair gel.

Love Island renamed F**knut Peninsula

ITV reality show Love Island is to be retitled F**knut Peninsula for the remainder of the current series.