Alcohol

A WOMAN was shocked to find she actually enjoys the taste of a craft beer IPA, she has confirmed.

A MAN who woke up at 8am on Sunday in a garden littered with empty beer cans has claimed he just ‘enjoyed the lovely weather’.

THE UK has demanded that confirmation that Boris Johnson will be prime minister be delayed to around 1.30am on Saturday.

A 30-YEAR-OLD man totally messed up a pleasant evening in the pub by buying tequila slammers, it has emerged.

A MAN who only drinks craft beer is suffering from a hangover he considers superior to one caused by mass-produced beer.

A WIFE who keeps agreeing to share a whole bottle of wine with her husband has only had one glass again, it has been confirmed.

MEN believe that drinking beer at any time of day is harmless so long as it is carried out within an airport departure lounge.

A GROUP of women have been spotted doing the 11am walk of shame to their city-centre hotel for a hen night.

AFTER consuming large amounts of alcohol it’s not always easy to tell exactly how shitfaced you are. Find out where you are on the ‘pissedness scale’ with our scientific guide.

FOLLOWING Carlsberg’s brave admission that it is probably not at all nice, other foul beers are publically confessing that they are swill.