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Pissing rain making woman feel all Christmassy

A WOMAN is standing inside looking out at the pissing rain that traditionally envelops Britain in December and feeling a Yuletide glow of warmth.

Nikki Hollis, aged 34, has her back to a roaring fire, a mug of mulled wine in her hand and is gazing fondly at the downpour that has accompanied every Christmas she can remember.

She said: “Ah, look at that. Brings a real festive feeling to your heart, seeing the drains flood.

“Takes me back to getting a pink Raleigh bike for Christmas when I was ten. I was so excited I couldn’t wait to rush out on it even though it was absolutely hammering down. I was squealing with joy as I peddled through the deluge.

“Memories of driving to Grandma’s through the drizzle, my first Christmas with my husband and us kissing in a pub doorway in a storm, a bedraggled robin on a garden fence while droplets streaked the windows.

“There’s nothing says Christmas more than blurred fairy lights seen through a car windscreen as you drive through a puddle. That’s why it’s on all the Christmas cards.

“Snow? No, it never snows at Christmas. Why would I associate it with snow?”

Classic movie moments your boyfriend talks over with behind-the-scenes trivia

WHEN your boyfriend suggests watching a film, he doesn’t want to engage with the story – he wants to show off his little facts to you. Here are some to get ahead of the game with.

Hans Gruber dies in Die Hard (1988)

If you’re this far into the Bruce Willis classic, you’ll already have put up with your boyfriend’s justifications for it being a Christmas film, in a debate everyone hates now. But don’t worry, he’ll also disrupt the finale to tell you Alan Rickman was dropped prematurely to capture a realistic look of shock. 

The shark appears in Jaws (1975)

Nothing adds to the slow-building tension and suspense of the Spielberg film like your boyfriend giving you a detailed rundown of exactly how the mechanical shark worked. Did you know it kept breaking down, but being forced to use it less improved the film in the end? Yes. Yes you f**king did,

Don Corleone speaks in The Godfather (1972)

He’ll quote his way through the whole thing like it’s a Sound of Music singalong. And then he’ll make sure you can’t appreciate any of the famous quotes by letting you know Marlon Brando read off cue cards. And then he’ll want to know why you don’t think it’s the best film ever made.

Every Stan Lee cameo in every Marvel film (2008-2019)

These superhero films can get repetitive. Even more so when you’re guaranteed to have the person next to you on the couch go ‘You know that taxi driver’s Stan Lee, he wrote the comics, or drew them or something?’ Oddly, Stan’s role in Avengers: Age of Ultron is not something you feel compelled to immediately text all your friends about.

Michael Myers appears in Halloween (1978)

It’s fun being scared by horror films, right? Your boyfriend has other ideas. Every time the fictional killer appears, you’ll be reminded he’s actually wearing a modified Captain Kirk mask, and now all you can see is a melted William Shatner running around.

Aragorn kicks a helmet in The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

Not only will you have to sit through a dull explanation of how Viggo Mortensen broke his toe when he kicked an orc helmet at the beginning of the film, you’ll then have to sit through an even duller explanation of how this first bit of trivia became a meme of how dull trivia can be.

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