Features

DID you get drunk at the weekend, or did you get drunk but the reasons why are excellent?

HERE'S the rundown of 2018’s prize bellends - plus a few that may surprise you.

MEGHAN Markle is a hateful, conniving individual, if you just make shit up. Here’s some wild speculation about the - probably - horrible cow.

Christmas is a time of year for maximum smugness. It's all about being with the family and making them feel like shit about their choices.

WITH shopping to do and parties to go to, it’s easy to forget the true meaning of Christmas - international socialism. Here’s how to have a left-wing festive season.

HAVE you been to some sort of Christmas 'do' five nights in a row and forgotten what it feels like to not be hungover? Here’s how to deal with it.

I AM a devoted Slade fan or ‘Sladean’, and you might think I’d love this time of year. Not so.

DESPITE the prime minister’s limpet-like determination to hang on, it could be time for her to think about a career change. Here are some suggestions.

Rule 1. If it looks like she’s going to lose, the game will be cancelled.

COULD you be any lazier? Seriously, could you? Take our test...