ENGLAND fans are deciding which barely-capped players to assign to positions they have never played in before to win the next game six-nil.
From Barrow-in-Furness to Brighton, fans are picking squad members almost at random, popping them into roles they are entirely unfamiliar with, sitting back and waiting for the goals to roll in.
Steve Malley of Bournemouth said: “Kobbie Mainoo in central defence? Can’t see why not.
“He’ll link up nicely with Wharton on the left wing, because he’s hardly played for the senior team either and certainly not in a high-pressure knockout game so they’ll have something in common.
“Throw Konsa in the midfield, Alexander-Arnold up front, Bellingham as left-back and Gordon in a free-roaming role literally wherever he wants.
“If the last few years of team solidity – a core of experienced players playing the same positions they play for their clubs – show us anything, it’s that it doesn’t win you shit, so let’s go wild like Graham motherf**king Taylor’s up in this bitch.”
Football writer Helen Archer said: “No, Guéhi as a number ten, Saka at the back, Cole Palmer as lone midfielder stroke centre-back and Bellingham in goal.
“And if that doesn’t work it’s Southgate’s fault.”
