Society

A MORON Londoner is learning to drive in the belief it will get her around the city faster.

NOT enough news happens each week to fill a local paper. That's why they lose their shit over these boring stories.

A BANK has explained to a woman paying out £950 per month on rent that she cannot afford a £550 mortgage because she does not have any spare money.

ARE you stupid in real life? Want to feel briefly intelligent? Simply do these obnoxious internet things.

A MOTORIST on the M5 believes himself engaged in a battle of minds and cars with another driver who has entirely failed to notice him.

WANT normal products but in spooky packaging? Supermarkets have got you covered with this Halloween-themed shit.

GET in the mood for Halloween with these spine-chilling tales. Just don’t think about them too deeply or you’ll realise they’re bollocks.

HAS the council suggested pedestrianising your local high street? You’d better write a furious rant about it on Facebook. Here are some things that set the dickheads off.

STRUGGLING to make ends meet? Beat the rising cost of living by selling off these frivolous luxuries for cash.

BEING for or against woke is all the rage at the moment. Instead of being reasonable, why not head straight for the demented extremes of the debate?