Society
Our kids aren't taking enough drugs, say rave parents
PARENTS who experienced rave culture are increasingly concerned about their children's low intake of Class A drugs.
Man wearing f**king shorts
THERE have been sightings of a man walking around in f**king shorts.
MPs recommend weed for Tories opposed to gay marriage
CANNABIS should be legalised for Tories who are frightened of the gayness, MPs have claimed.
Patrick Moore probably going to be remembered as an astrologer
STARGAZER Patrick Moore will be remembered an astrologer, because a lot of people are not very bright.
Britain declared uninhabitable
BRITAIN is unsuitable for human life, it has been confirmed.
Millions lucky enough to spend Christmas Day alone
SEVERAL million fortunate individuals will be enjoying peaceful solitude on Christmas Day, it has emerged.
Lots of lazy bastards have jobs
THOUSANDS of bone idle people have full-time paid employment, it has emerged.
Clever people obsessively bored with royal baby
SELF-STYLED clever people cannot stop expressing their indifference to the royal offspring, it has emerged.
