International

How about we forget the bill and get straight to the part we like, says Davis

THE UK has suggested the EU skip this whole bill business and go straight to the part where we get everything we want.

Kim wants to be Trump who wants to be Putin

KIM JONG-UN desperately wants to be Donald Trump who yearns to be Vladimir Putin, psychologists have agreed.

There are bad factions on both sides of this hurricane, claims Trump

DONALD Trump has claimed that there are bad factions on both sides of the hurricane that hit America this weekend.

America to remain in darkness until at least 2020

THERE will be a darkness cloaking America for at least the next three years, it has emerged.

Davis brings cake to EU meeting and insists he wants to eat it then somehow take it home

DAVID Davis has turned up to latest round of EU negotiations with a cake that he says he wants to eat but then still have afterwards.

Bannon calls White House to ask if he left sack of wild snakes there

STEVE Bannon called the White House to see if anyone has found a sack containing wild snakes, it has been confirmed.

Trump to chew long piece of grass while holding shotgun across his shoulders

DONALD Trump is to conduct the rest of 'presidency' while balancing a shotgun across the back of his neck and chewing on a piece of grass.

How much money would it take for you to just f**k off? world asks Trump

THE global population has asked Donald Trump to name his price for f**king off and never coming back.

Davis trying to sneak old Ford Fiesta he can't shift into Brexit deal 


DAVID Davis has tried to sneak a number of things he has been trying to sell online into the Brexit deal, it has been confirmed.

I like people who shout ‘Hail Trump’, confirms Trump

DONALD Trump has clarified his position on violent white supremacists by confirming that he really likes being 'hailed'.