Arts & Entertainment

Neighbour blaring music in garden actually made this mixtape for you

THE blaring music from next door’s garden is actually a playlist they have especially put together for you, they have nervously admitted.

Woman's copy of Normal People has ten pleasure settings

A WOMAN’S paperback copy of Normal People has three different speeds and ten different pleasure settings, she has confirmed.

Nation f**king sick of quizzes

PEOPLE in Britain are officially sick of doing f**king quizzes, they have confirmed.

We’re not going back to work until we've finished our box-sets, Britain tells government

BRITISH workers have demanded assurances that they get to see how Breaking Bad and Mad Men end before returning to their workplaces.

Are you in lockdown or a Disney princess?

IN these locked-down times it’s hard to remember whether you are a real person or an animated Disney character.

Man trapped in never-ending Normal People nightmare

A MAN is trapped in a never-ending nightmare of his wife binge-watching Irish relationship drama Normal People, he has confirmed.

Britain will always associate this difficult time with that lube advert

THE UK has confirmed that it will always associate this tough and tragic time with that lube advert that is never off the air.

Man recreates music festival at home by wetting himself in a sleeping bag

A MAN has recreated the experience of attending a music festival in his own home by wetting himself in a sleeping bag.

Which livestream will you give up on tonight?

THE entertainment industry has pulled out all the stops to keep us going with new livestreams every night. But which will you abandon within minutes?

Man playing Doom Eternal for escape into a brighter, happier world

A MAN struggling to cope with what has happened to the world is finding cheerful escapism in a videogame where he slaughters demons in hell.