THE UK has agreed that the long, slow demise of Boris Johnson should be as long, as slow and as enjoyable as possible.
Yesterday’s resignation of Javid and Sunak is merely a delicious hors d’oeuvres to the prime minister’s thrashing, helpless downfall, savoured by all those who want to watch the bastard suffer.
Nathan Muir of Hitchin said: “How perfect that it happened just in time for the evening meal. What exquisite timing. No need to rush this when we don’t want to miss a moment.
“Nobody cares about those two pricks. They’re merely the tipping point, a signal to the whole nation that the main course of humiliation is being seasoned for our delectation.
“Of course I want Boris gone, who doesn’t? Even solid Tories in the shires have had enough. But now it’s inevitable, we can afford to relish it.
“There’s so much more to come. Ideally it’ll take weeks if not months of desperate flailing, of false dawns where the deluded twat thinks he can actually get away with it before the next crippling blow. We’ve got a whole summer of this. Mmm.
“Let the men in grey suits stay their hands. Let him cling on feverishly to his power as it slips away. This is the best excuse to drink on a work night we’ve had since Covid.”
