BORIS Johnson’s baby is at that special age where he is blissfully unaware of who exactly his dad is.
Newborn Frank Alfred Odysseus Johnson is so young he cannot mentally comprehend what a colossal twat his father is, and is oblivious to how much he is hated by the public.
A friend of the family said: “Frank’s less than a week old. He can barely string a thought together, let alone understand who his feckless father is. He’s lucky. For now.
“The words ‘unlawfully prorogued parliament’, ‘Partygate’, and ‘Jennifer Arcuri’ mean nothing to him. Imagine if you could say the same yourself. Just think how happy you’d be not knowing about all that pathetic Poundland wrongdoing.
“For quite some time Frank will be able to look his dad squarely in his scruffy-haired face and not be terrified that this is his destiny. Jesus, how must Jacob Rees-Mogg’s kids feel?
“I hope he enjoys his ignorance while it lasts. Gradually it’ll dawn on him that his dad is a blustering bellend whose dismal non-leadership is still shafting Britain. And you can’t unring that bell.
“Realising one of his middle names is Odysseus will probably alert him to the fact that something’s off.”
