DESPITE claims to the contrary, women love to be referred to as ‘girls’ in the workplace, it has been confirmed.
Adult women in all industries dislike titles that make them seem unflatteringly old, and would much rather their male colleagues and superiors refer to them by something more youthful.
Office worker Nikki Hollis said: “When I started here this place had a toxic atmosphere. Men would call me by my name or, even worse, ask me for my preferred title. I felt like a withered old hag.
“I talked to the birds from HR and a dolly from the canteen and we all agreed enough was enough. We bravely stood up for our rights and demanded to be referred to as one group, like a class of incontinent toddlers.
“Miraculously, it worked. Now the men call us ‘girls’, place their hands on our lower backs when they want us to move out of their way and take credit for our ideas, which is exactly what we wanted. We feel young again.”
Boss Stephen Malley said: “I always listen to the girls’ demands. Also, it means I don’t have to be arsed to remember all those silly female names.”
