A COUPLE have brought the thrill back to their relationship, both in and out of the bedroom, with the judicious purchase of a gram of cocaine.
Ryan Whittaker and Hannah Tomlinson admitted they had fallen into a weekend wine-and-movies rut before enlivening their evenings with nothing more than a class A substance.
Hannah said: “We got it for a friend’s party. That got cancelled so we thought we’d save it for a special occasion, but last Friday I turned to Ryan and said ‘How about now?’
“And honestly, the effect was amazing. We suddenly had so much more to say to each other and it was all so fascinating. Ryan was breathlessly unfolding this story about work and I was agog.
“Instead of yawning off to bed at half-eleven we’re still up chatting at 2am, just loving each other’s company like when we first got together. That energy’s back and it’s incredible.
“And when we go to bed it isn’t to sleep. We’re all over each other and going at it hard, not half-heartedly. There’s so much more excitement and passion and the orgasms are next-level. Who knew that such a little thing could make such a huge difference?”
Whittaker agreed: “I think this could be the secret to long-term relationship happiness. I can’t see any way it could go wrong.”
