A BEE has admitted he is put off mating with the hive’s queen because she has already mated with dozens of other drones.
Martin Bishop knows his sole function is to reproduce with a maiden queen during her nuptial flight, but has lost interest after learning how many more sexual partners she has had than him.
He said: “I’m not insecure or anything. I’m confident in my apis manhood. I just think that if she’s racked up double digits then she’s probably for the streets.
“It’s a red flag if she’s had dalliances with so many guys that she can’t even remember all of their names. If she’s okay with me knowing that, then what don’t I know? What’s she keeping secret?
“I get that everyone has a past. And I’m cool if she’s had a couple of long-term relationships, maybe even experimented with another queen one time. But multiple drones?
“Her choice, but I’m more of a traditional boy meets girl, boy pumps girl with seminal fluid, boy dies from ruptured abdomen type. I’ll still shag her, but only for the sake of the colony.”
Queen bee Nikki Hollis said: “Martin’s just worried he won’t compare to that hornet I dated in college. Which he won’t.”
