A MAN who has spent 16 years in London has moved back to Wolverhampton so he can be closer to those who do not earn nearly as much money as he does.
Highly paid strategy manager Will McKay has ostensibly returned to the West Midlands city to be near his elderly parents, where he can also afford a four-bedroom house and has an income in the top three per cent.
He said: “I’ve fitted mum’s bathroom with handrails. Now which of my old school pals who never made it anywhere wants to go for a drink?
“I moved here out of necessity, obviously, not because I was in a one-bedroom flat in a shithole area which was miraculously worth £350k. But it really is good to reconnect with people and see how they’ve turned out. I’ll buy the drinks! They cost basically nothing!
“It seems most of my peers are working in retail or as hairdressers, which makes me chuckle as it’s exactly what I would have expected. But it’s much more relaxing than hanging out with people who pay £35 for a negroni without f**king blinking.
“‘I’m just like you,’ I tell my old friends. ‘I still work, albeit only three days a week, and take my old dad to football once in a while. Now is there anyone else I’ve not touched base with? Ideally who’s even more of a loser than you?’”
Former classmate Mary Fisher said: “Hey, you’ll never guess who’s back in Wolves. Willy Pissypants? Remember, who weed himself in Year Nine maths?”
