ARSENE Wenger has refused to comment on Arsenal’s draw against Leyton Orient, claiming not to have seen any of it.
The French Thunderbird puppet was led out of the Brisbane Road ground by Pat Rice whilst wearing a blindfold, following the Gallic belief that anything that cannot be seen has not happened.
Many older French people use the same mehtod to maintain that their country was never invaded by Germany.
Wenger said: “No idea what you’re talking about. I do know we beat Barcelona on Wednesday if you’d like to talk about that. Though I have to admit I didn’t see the first 78 minutes of that game either.”
Wenger’s selective vision has plagued his time at Arsenal and has meant he has no recollection that Francis Jeffers or Manuel Almunia have ever played for the club.
Footballologist Wayne Hayes said a number of managers in the Premier League share Wenger’s belief they can change reality simply by refusing to accept a thing has happened, though psychiatrists warned this could tip them into a Benitez where not only do things not happen but things that have hot happened happen.
Hayes said: “Although Alex Ferguson still attends United matches and takes an interest in them, in his head they’re still playing the 3,750,000th minute of extra time of their 2003 3-1 home defeat to Fulham.
“Meanwhile Sam Allardyce is currently sat in a Lancashire rest home with a blanket over his knees in the belief he’s steering Real Madrid to an historic unbeaten season.”
But Wenger is adamant thaere was nothing to see on Sunday, adding: “If so it would have been on television, would it not?
“What’s on earth is an ‘ESPN’?”