EVERTON have begun searching for a new manager with an advert offering the chance to lead a ‘historic, prestigious club based in Liverpool’.
Applicants have reported severe disappointment at discovering the role is in fact with Everton Football Club, particularly questioning the use of the word ‘prestigious’.
Sean Dyche said: “Describing Everton as a ‘Liverpool-based football club’ is like describing Oxford Brookes as ‘an Oxford-based university’ or spam as a pork-based meat.
“When they mentioned ‘a past track record of European glory’ it turned out they were referring to the European Cup Winners’ Cup in 1984-85.
“Even the picture at the top of the advert was from the Merseyside derby so you could mostly see Liverpool players and fans.
“I’ll ask at the interview whether there’s a way to get transferred to Anfield if I do a good job.”
Former manager Ronald Koeman said: “I honestly believed I was Liverpool boss until a few days ago. I presumed we’d just been wearing our third kit a lot.
“It does now make a lot more sense of why I never heard a single rendition of You’ll Never Walk Alone and why we tended to lose to people like Burnley.”