THINK things were better in the old days? Feel nostalgic for a time you didn’t live through? Find out if you would have been happier living through the Blitz.
How do you feel about returning to the office?
A) Mildly annoyed, mainly because I work in a stressful, underpaid job with total arseholes.
B) Fine. I’m bravely back at my desk. I wish there were some doodlebugs exploding, though. That sounds exciting.
Should we bring back rationing?
A) With all the supply chain issues still going on it might stop pricks panic buying.
B) Absolutely. Living on four ounces of cooking fat and one egg per week would solve this country’s obesity crisis in a matter of months.
How do you feel about Europe?
A) I’m surprised they even talk to us after years of acting like total dicks.
B) The whole continent’s gone to hell in a handbasket and needs us plucky Brits to step in and sort it out again, just like on D-Day.
You’ve had a shit day, what do you do?
A) Complain to my partner who will half listen while scrolling on their phone and occasionally go ‘oh right’.
B) Bottle up my emotions while stoically remembering a hardship I didn’t endure. Or cheer myself up by humming ‘We’re Going to Hang Out the Washing on the Siegfried Line’.
What does ‘Blitz spirit’ mean to you?
A) It increasingly sounds like propaganda to make you go along with our daft, self-inflicted modern problems without whingeing.
B) It’s a patriotic, morale-boosting attitude that doesn’t suggest a weird obsession with the events of 75 years ago that other countries don’t have.
ANSWERS
Mostly As: You haven’t drunk the Blitz Kool-Aid, meaning you weirdly don’t want to return to a time of nightly bombing raids and unprecedented misery. Watch more war films, the less realistic the better.
Mostly Bs: In your opinion, the Blitz was the highlight of human history and if you had a time machine you’d live there permanently. You’d probably think Anderson Shelters were ‘elf ‘n’ safety gone mad’, though.