A SECONDARY school is spuriously arguing that today’s Year 7 trip to a theme park has educational value.
After criticism of last year’s scientific expedition to Go Ape, parents of pupils at the Frank Whittle Academy have received a letter explaining why queuing for Rita, Queen of Speed is a key part of the national curriculum.
Head of year Emma Bradford said: “I’ve been around every department gathering spurious justifications, like a fun end-of-term project for teachers.
“Physics put together a worksheet about centrifugal force but it required them to fill in worksheets on The Smiler. History said it’s definitely been around a while so the kids could research that if they wanted. Business Studies wanted us to work out a ride-to-queue ratio which is just depressing.
“In the end we said it was a PE trip, which doesn’t really make much sense except everyone knows PE’s a doss. I suppose the kids are engaging their cores when they’re on Nemesis Reborn. And the River Rapids is kind of like kayaking.
“Either way we’ve sent the letter, it’s a learning experience that will enrich the pupils as individuals, and also please send them with at least £40 for snacks. £80 if they think they might fancy two.”
She added: “All completed worksheets to be submitted to me at the pub. Yes, there’s a pub at Alton Towers. School trips are why.”
