NOT all millennials are dreadful arseholes, one of them has insisted.
Josh Peters, a 27-year-old who works as a social media marketing intern, made the extraordinary claim despite appearing to be little more than a walking, talking sperm with a hairstyle.
“We are not all narcissistic, lazy and overconfident”, the narcissistic, lazy and overconfident little bastard whined, absolutely stinking the place out with his sense of entitlement.
“Sure some young people are superficial and self-absorbed, but you can’t tarnish us all with the same brush,” the soulless prick droned on, using a figure of speech he probably got from an ironic list on Buzzfeed.
But the claim was refuted by Stephen Malley, aged 37, who works at the same company as Peters but in a job someone born before 1995 has a chance of understanding.
He said: “Josh is as bad as the rest of those over privileged foetuses. Sure he’s always on time, gets his work done and is a pleasure to deal with, but he’s a millennial and is therefore scum.
“If millennials wanted to go to university for free and be able to buy a flat they should have got in there first like the Baby Boomers and Generation X.
“But no, they’ve just turned up late and moaned about it. Yet another example of millennial laziness and entitlement.”