THE amount it costs to be alive in Britain does not offer value for money, it has been confirmed.
With the price of food, rent and utilities continuing to go through the roof, people in the UK have realised the cost of living does not provide a good return on investment and they should no longer bother.
Tom Logan from Peterborough said: “If you were forking out a fortune for such a shit experience in any other financial transaction you’d ask to see the manager for a refund. And you’d deserve it.
“But I can’t even tag anyone to publicly shame them on Twitter because the cost of living crisis is complex and nebulous and indicative of the inherent flaws of late-stage capitalism. Which is annoying.”
Nikki Hollis from Doncaster said: “Energy bills going up by 65 per cent? F**k that. I’ll just carry on paying the old prices, which were still ridiculous but much fairer in comparison.
“Then when all my money runs out I’ll neatly tuck myself under a bridge and slowly die. Being dead doesn’t cost a penny and you get to do it forever, which is a really good deal if you ask me.”
