WE’VE all been there – you make a perfectly harmless gesture with your right arm and everyone thinks you’re a Nazi. Here are some of the things Elon Musk was probably doing.
Practising a karate chop
You may be thinking of taking up karate, and are just testing your chopping skills against a taller opponent. This is an extremely plausible explanation because there is no evidence of Elon being a fascist except supporting the fascist AfD, agreeing with white supremacists and allowing neo-Nazis to fill Twitter with references to ‘14 words’ and N-word-filled gibberish.
Waving to someone
What could be more harmless than waving to someone? Admittedly it’s unusual to not repeat the waving motion and throw your arm out so enthusiastically. But maybe it’s just someone very important to you, such as a friend you haven’t seen for years, a long-lost love, or your buddies in the SS.
Reaction to a cough
Hitting your chest is a common instinctive reaction to a coughing fit. However people have claimed that striking your heart before extending your right arm is the classic fascist salute used by Mussolini. Therefore anyone who does it knows exactly what they’re doing and is possibly a nerdy, impressionable dipshit who thinks fascism is ‘edgy’ and probably a bit of a racist anyway. But that’s not Elon at all.
Muscle memory of catching a frisbee
Muscle memory enables you to perform actions without consciously thinking about them. So if you play a lot of frisbee it would be second nature for your arm to flick out to catch one. Maybe frisbee is one of Elon’s passions. We’ll know if he starts claiming to be in the top five frisbee players in the world then lies about it pathetically when he’s easily found out.
Pulling your hand back in Tenet-style reversed time
Giving a Nazi salute would actually just be moving your hand inwards from a raised position if time was moving backwards like in the Christopher Nolan film Tenet. Admittedly Nolan invented the concept of ‘reverse entropy’ just so he could have backwards fights and wrecked cars uncrashing themselves, but who can claim to understand all the mysteries of our quantum universe?
A romantic gesture
Who hasn’t seen a lover off on a train with an outstretched hand denoting your longing for them? It’s frankly disgusting that people are calling Elon a Nazi when he was probably just lost in loving thoughts about his girlfriend, a past love like Grimes, or the Proud Boys.
A muscle spasm
This is the obvious reason for appearing to give a Nazi salute. Dr Strangelove had a similar problem. However a muscle spasm may not just be the result of cramp or a pinched nerve and could indicate a more serious condition, so Elon should get it checked out. Let’s hope it is only something trivial, because X is a cauldron of vicious, barely-provoked hatred Musk has done little to stop, and it probably wouldn’t be very nice to see ‘#MUSK DEAD YET?’ trending every day.
