DESPITE being films for the whole family, there are plenty of Disney characters you’d do given half the chance. Here are some of their most shaggable animated hotties:
Ariel from The Little Mermaid
With her flowing locks of auburn hair and stunning singing voice, Ariel is a knockout. Most people would probably go for the on-land version as the logistics of mermaid sex are hard to fathom, but it would be boring not to be able to chat to her. Another negative is her obsession with gizmos, whatsits and thingamabobs, as it means she’d probably want to drag you round car boots every weekend.
Gaston from Beauty and the Beast
Gaston is a right bastard, which would make for a toxic, difficult relationship, but he’s just so much hotter than the typical soppy Disney bloke like Ariel’s beau Eric. Gaston has colossal muscles and a head like an Easter Island statue and, even though you know he’ll break your heart, you’d definitely let him whisk you away into the forest and shag you up against a majestic cartoon oak tree.
Rapunzel from Tangled
Not only is Rapunzel a beauty, but – due to being locked in a tower her whole life – she’s been bored out of her mind and is desperate to have new experiences and learn new skills. So not only would she be an enthusiastic sexual partner but she’d also be thrilled to learn how to tarmac your drive, rewire the house and cook a Beef Wellington. The one downside is that, having 50 metres of hair to maintain, she’d take ages getting ready for a night out.
Elsa from Frozen
If you like your women poised, complicated and able to create and control ice and snow, then Elsa is the one for you. You’d have to live in an ice palace, which might be a bit chilly, but think of all the time you’d have to get really good at skiing. Elsa’s got a lot going for her and would 100% get it, as long as she signed a legally binding contract never to sing that f**king song.
Grown-up Simba from The Lion King
Noble, regal and handsome, the adult Simba is a stone-cold hunk with a lustrous mane, a gravelly voice and a burning desire to avenge his father’s death. And no, it’s not at all weird to fancy non-human Disney characters, as ardent fans of the Robin Hood fox, Lady from Lady and the Tramp and that sexy teapot from Beauty and Beast will assure you.
