THE August bank holiday is easily the worst of all the year’s bank holidays, the UK has decided. 

While grudgingly accepting that it is at least a day off, Britons believe that any honest comparison between the August bank holiday and its rivals will conclude that it comes at the very bottom of the list.

Nathan Muir of Hitchin said: “Oh, we’ll take it. But nobody really enjoys it.

“Going through chronologically, the two days at Christmas are mint and New Year’s Day is entirely necessary. Nobody would change those.

“Easter’s weird because it moves around but you get two at once which is always awesome, and there’s a bracing novelty to having a Friday off.

“The first May one’s good because it signals spring’s properly getting warm, and the second one’s even better because it’s the start of summer. They’re a perfect pair.

“But August? Means it’s the end of summer, back to school, the darkness is closing in, all the good times are over and the next four months are just bleak, painful reality as the year’s promise slips away. It’s a bummer of a bank holiday and an intimation of death.

“No wonder they put Reading and Leeds on this weekend, like a black mass for our hearts.”