A COLLEAGUE 300 miles away in an entirely different part of Britain has expressed surprise that the weather is different there.

While Lucy Parry in Bournemouth is looking out of the window at heavy rain after a night of storms, Ryan Whittaker in Preston is basking in sunshine.

He said: “Are you sure? Because it’s absolutely gorgeous here.

“There’s not a cloud in the sky. Do you mean Tuesday? Because it was raining Tuesday.

“Yes, there is significant distance and a mountain range between us. Yes, you are exposed to the weather systems of the English channel while I’m up by the Irish Sea. Yes, I am 32 and should have encountered this before. But this discrepancy still seems unlikely.

“Have you actually been outside and checked that it’s really raining? Because, as I say, there’s not a cloud in the sky here. Baffling.”

Parry said: “Whatever. I’d still rather be here than in f**king Preston.”