A MAN is lavishing attention on his hangover and giving it everything it could possibly need no matter what the expense.
Beginning by getting up at 6am, without complaint, to give his hangover the pint of water and two paracetamol it was noisily demanding, Nathan Muir has made sure it wants for absolutely nothing.
Housemate Lauren Hewitt said: “He’s in his room, curtains closed, whispering ‘there, there’ to it while they gently watch old episodes of The Mandalorian together.
“There’s a note in the kitchen asking everyone to be quiet so as not to set it off. He’s hand-feeding it Monster Munch and bottled Lucozade, careful not to disturb it with bright lights or sudden movements.
“This is a man who’d rather steal napkins than buy toilet paper, but at lunchtime a Deliveroo from Greggs arrived ‘because this hangover deserves to be treated with respect’.
“He’s running a hot bath with candles and relaxing music, just to soothe the hangover. If he could give this much devotion and attention to a woman he wouldn’t have been single for six years.”
Muir said: “Treat a hangover well and it’ll treat you well. And when the moment is right, I’ll give it the ultimate reward: lager.”
